Friday Random Thought Round-up: Masculinism
Once the party died down at FFF headquarters, I realized we have a blog to run! After cleaning the margarita salt out of my hair and unearthing my shoes from the giant pile of nuts that had spilled from our man-shaped pinata (rest in peace, Gordy) I sat down to get to work and fill the pages with the same sublime thoughts that fill my mind.
I know my thoughts will be fascinating to everyone who comes to this page - i.e., my parents and the friends I make look at it. First of all, can I pull off clogs? Also, what is Christian Bale like in person? What did that footage in ‘Grizzly Man’ that Werner Herzog did not play sound like? Where’s my burrito?
Mostly though, my thoughts turned to Masculinism. There is a definition of masculinism you will find on urban dictionary or Wikipedia that is basically a men’s rights movement, and it is inexplicably called ‘masculism’ at times. It’s a bunch of asinine crap - but kind of hilarious in its ridiculousness.
The other definition of masculinism - a definition that is useful for something other than my own amusement at MRA’s stupidity - is thinking and acting in a way that does not necessarily discriminate solely based on physical gender, but privileges and rewards those who behave in ways that are traditionally thought of as masculine (note that I am not saying that there are characteristics that are naturally masculine or feminine, but that our society thinks of traits in that way). I first recognized this phenomenon while I was living in a cooperative that housed 14 people. Often in meetings, the people who could most forcefully make their points while appealing to logic and reason were greatly respected, whereas those who showed any emotion or based their decisions on how they felt were looked down on. These behaviors crossed gender lines, yet it is still an issue of sexism because it denigrates traditionally feminine behaviors, communication styles, and modes of thinking.
Masculinism is a problem within feminist circles, as well. Women often get upset when another woman does not actively rise up and fight oppression with full force. The types of things you are just supposed to be able to fight just as easily as thinking that it’s wrong include workplace harassment, street harassment, and any and all sexist comments that one hears. Apparently, if you don’t go all Death Proof on their asses, you have ‘made yourself into a victim.’
This is just a thinly veiled version of plain ‘ol victim-blaming. You take someone who has been socialized their whole life to be submissive, you harass and abuse them, and then they are responsible for the harassment and abuse because they didn’t karate chop the harassers and abusers.
Think about this the next time you interact with someone. Do you treat people differently if they are softspoken, versus someone who is outgoing and gregarious? Do you ever look at someone who is angry but can’t express it to the person causing the situation and think it’s their fault if they don’t say anything? This is not to say it is a bad thing to be outgoing, or to be assertive and confront people when they do offensive things. It is merely to say that our society continually privileges and rewards those who carry those characteristics, and paints others as deserving of any trouble that comes their way because they should learn to fight it.
August 11th, 2007 at 11:31 am
I do not know much about masculinism, but I do know that you should be forever grateful that I did not allow that bit of the bear mauling Timothy into the movie. I suffered greatly myself listneing to it, and I had hoped that by witnessing my suffering it would be enough for the audience to NEVER EVER NEVER EVER NEVER EVER want to hear such a thing.
August 11th, 2007 at 2:05 pm
Yes, as I understand it, it would have been the elephant in the room for the rest of my life.
August 13th, 2007 at 10:27 am
Kudos on your second post! Three of my favorite feminists tearing it up on the interweb, making mincemeat out of its tubes and wires, not to mention its stooped-in-patriarchy users!
You know, i also recently lived in a patriarchal, completely white dominated cooperative in which showing emotion while attempting to make a point was perceived as “showing emotion” and one was quickly found guilty of “showing emotion while attempting to make a point.”
I am excited about the “room for other stuff.” Perhaps this can become a useful forum for talking about the intersections of different forms of oppression.
Anyways, i am off on my joyful way with a little more knowledge and consciousness thanks to you.
g
August 14th, 2007 at 8:53 am
Hey Garbanzo,
Thanks for reading. Yes, we are hoping to talk about the intersections of different forms of oppression.
I was wondering if this:
means you agree with me, or that you are refuting my point?
August 14th, 2007 at 9:57 am
Hey Red,
Agreeing with you. Sorry, for the equivocal nature of my statement, that’s one drawback of trying to be funny and also assuming that you catch my drift.
I meant that when one expresses emotion in this certain household that one is found guilty of disrupting the order of things and creating conflict in a place that does not tolerate conflict. The funny part about it is that it all circles back to the same point: emotion was expressed (and we are supposed to assume that this is bad by definition, which is funny in a sad way.)
Of course one can quickly gather in situations like these that being opposed to conflict means to be opposed to visible conflict, which leaves less visible (but just as real) conflict and power dynamics left in tact.